when life finds a way to get back at you
i've been through day one of pakshet week and i'm feeling slightly optimistic about it...slightly. well...right now i'm yming cynthia and ajong who both have problems regarding their...er...guy friends...yeah...a while ago i was talking to stellar and rika...both of which thought life was shit so..there. gawd. why's everyone so down? shiyet sana ako hindi...i don't wanna feel down on pakshet week! no!! i read chapter six of our maccoms book and i kinda got the worksheet process thingy. kewl. there.. :sigh:i wanna rant about ross coz we got into each other's nerves again this afternoon...i dunno is it me or have people changed? i mean, everyone's so bitchy nowadays...yeah even me. weird. and then there's the fact that i'm now 18 years old. sounds so...great..but hey...as someone said..er i forgot..pearl i think said that..it entails a lot of responsibilities. hell. i feel so old and i feel like i wanna be seventeen again. i wanna feel in between in the sense that i could be silly and mature at the same time...see i can't do that now coz i'm 18. gawd. it just sucks the way people look at me like omg she's 18 now and she's all grown up when deep inside there's so many kid stuff i missed out in life that i wanna do...i still wanna sit on swings and slide down slides and play jackstones and have this big crush on a rock star or teacher or classmate...i wanna be the young me again...i wanna fall in love and believe that love is a good thing and that you need not get hurt just to love someone. yeah so i'm mushy fuck those who can't respect what i think. the point is...i miss my being naive...my being innocent. my being the little girl.
feeling ko ngayon ang dungis dungis ko na. hindi ko siya sinisisi...sinisisi ko sarili ko kase tanga ako. ang tanga ko para magkagusto sa kanya. ang tanga ko at nagkakaganito ako nang dahil sa kanya. ayoko na. gusto ko lang ngayon mabalik yung dating ako. yung amoy baby powder. hindi yung may halong pabango mo. i feel like i wanna scrub everything off me, the feel of your lips on my skin..coz right now i feel like a piece of crap. fine i know it is my fault...so hell i suffer this feeling of being gross and dirty and... *tries hard not to cry*
we don't stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing. ~ sabi ni stellar..
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home